Playing Your Heart Out

Alongside my love of writing, comes a somewhat surprising love of sports and fitness. A book worm and band nerd, I also played three sports all of high school, and both club and collegiate volleyball in college. I have watched team sports evolve over the last decade, and although expectations, time commitments, and even rules have changed, there are some constants that make playing sports with a team a life experience worth having.

Effort Equals Everything

There’s no better feeling than leaving it all on the court or field. Whether I win or lose, as long as I’ve given my best effort, the feeling of satisfaction runs strong. Leaving the volleyball court feeling bruised and sweaty makes all the drills and practice worth it. Walking away from the soccer field breathing heavily and dragging stinky sports equipment makes all the conditioning and repetition seem distant and forgotten.

The value of being a try-hard and putting visible effort in during athletics hasn’t changed. People will always have different levels of skill and talent, but hard work is what sets some people apart. It’s what separates the stellar athletes from the average players.

It can be tough to put 100% effort all the time, though. So how do you stay focused and driven? How do you bring the best version of yourself to each practice, game, match, or competition?

Bringing the Best You in sports (and life)

• Get the recommended amount of sleep for your age
• Eat healthy, nutrient-rich foods
• Drink water and electrolyte-rich drinks
• Listen to empowering music or speeches
• Read inspirational stories or quotes
• Watch motivating videos or speeches
• Study your opponents, skills, or strategies
• Have a routine for going to practice and games
• Communicate with your teammates outside of practice and games
• Be aware of your moods and stressors in order to communicate to teammates

Teamwork Makes the dream work

Some of the best people in my life played a team sport with me. Accomplishing a physical goal with a group of like-minded people helps complete that feeling of satisfaction. Each person on an ideal team should play a role. It may not be their perceived ideal role, or where they wanted to be, but they should have a place or purpose. Although in volleyball, there have been positions added and rules changed, like the libero, the idea of depending on your teammates has not.

Working with a team means working with individuals of varying capabilities, temperaments, backgrounds, and motivations. If everyone on the team is on the same page, teams can take on any challenge. If someone isn’t put in the right role, or believes they should be something else on the team, teams can create their own biggest challenge. I’ve played on a variety of both, learning empathy, patience, strategy, communication skill, and more. The sport itself is my passion, but my teammates are what keep me playing during the down times and tough points.

FAILURE FUELS FOCUS

Those tough points and down times were often what taught me the most about the sport, people, and life in general. Something else that remains an inherent part of sports is the fact that failure can be the best teacher when framed correctly. As a player, thinking back on the points I lost, being able to reflect on why and how I lost those points helped focus me in on what I need to work on.

As a coach and parent of an athlete, how I address these failures is somewhat different than it would have been when I was an athlete. You have to be very careful what you say and how you say it. There are many new factors in making someone feel like a failure, including social media. Making sure athletes understand that failure is how points are scored helps them realize it’s not the end of the world. Pushing them to reflect on what led up to that failure is the best way to help them feel as if they can overcome it next time the situation arises.

Humility Helps

Nothing can kill a team’s vibe quicker than an arrogant attitude or individual. I’ve always had self-esteem issues, body image issues, and the normal social, peer pressure issues that most girls have. This means I very rarely feel confident enough to be arrogant. The volleyball court is the one place I used to allow it to happen, because I did feel confident and in charge.

I quickly learned that those moments ended up creating a rift between myself and my teammates. It didn’t matter if I’d just served the game-winning point, or killed the match-winning set; if I didn’t celebrate with my teammates and give them the gratitude they deserved, the distance between us grew. The key to success in team sports is being humble enough to lift up your teammates instead of yourself.

Grit gains greatness

One final thing that hasn’t changed about team sports is the fact that having grit matters. Focusing on the long-term goals, whether they are for that season or for a lifetime, helps one have perseverance and passion in those moments when we don’t want to work hard. Grit is what makes the difference between consistency and chaos, courageous and cowardly.

Grit is a trait some people have more of naturally, but life experience, observation, reflection, and training can fine-tune this quality. Setting goals, reading or hearing other people’s inspirational stories, role-playing in individual or team situations, and conditioning within game-like drills are some ideas of what help develop grit.

Effort, teamwork, failure, humility, and grit are constants in a world where everything can change in an instant. Teaching athletes to focus and deal with these traits is paramount to helping them win, not only in sports, but in life. Team sports may be constantly evolving, but there are some things that should never change.